Not a Resolution, a Realization
“And then one day you’ll realize, you don’t need any diapers.”
We do what we need to do to survive, to make it to the next day. After a while our actions become habit. Just a normal part of life. Until it’s not. We get ourselves so wrapped up in what we do we forget that we even do it. We put our heads down and go and keep going. Sometimes by the time we come up for air we barely recognize where we are. We hardly know where we’ve been.
A discussion I had a few weeks ago with an old friend has stuck with me. “When you have babies,” he was explaining “you find yourself buying diapers every time you go to the store. It’s just something that you do because you always need diapers.”
I can certainly identify with this, having 2 young kids. Diapers have become a main part of our daily routine. Much like water, we cannot survive without them. The reality is I don’t even hardly account for their cost in our budget because it doesn’t matter. We’re going to buy them because we have to have them. It is just something that we do.
My friend continued explaining that as life continues on, “you’ll continue to go to the store and get the things that you need and then one day you’ll realize, you don’t need any diapers. That time of life has passed you by.”
The End of an Era (Means the Start of Something)
The obvious significance of not needing diapers anymore is that an era has ended. Rarely, however, in life does something begin without another something starting.
What I have been pondering is how often I catch myself off guard by getting caught up and calculating life as it currently is that I fail to prepare for what it soon will be. Am I the person that walks down the aisle to buy diapers only to stop short in sudden realization of the pointless of my task? Or have I already known for weeks and months that this day was approaching? Have I made conscious efforts along the way with my wife and children to prepare for a new stage of life?
At this point discussing diapers may be a little bit simplistic but how often do small things like diapers turn in to bigger things like finishing college, or even making a final payment on a car? Do I already have planned what happens next or am I flying by the seat of my pants?
One great piece of advice that I have received and I highly recommend is to look in to the future. That’s not even a joke. As the advice goes:
all of us are very similar. We all have to go down similar paths and have similar hardships. Sure, there are differences and some people’s challenges vary but take a good look at 3-5 (or more) people that were in your same type of situation 10 years ago. Look at where they are now and why. There is a good chance if you make the same types of choices you will also be in the same type of situation that they are currently in.
This is actually something that I have found myself doing in small ways throughout my life. I am doing it more often now with a purpose with people that I admire and respect. The more I’ve learned the more I know that there isn’t one right way to do something but there are common things that successful people continually do right.
The End of an Era (The End of a Journey?)
In thinking about planning and preparing for where to go next and how to smoothly transition junctures I couldn’t help but take myself back to buying diapers and eventually not buying diapers. I’ve not yet reached this point in my life but I had the realization that while it signifies progress and moving on to the next point in life it also signifies several key moments of my children’s lives have now passed. I couldn’t help but feel sad that someday I won’t need to buy diapers.
I’ve asked myself if I’ve taken the diapers for granted? And further, is there a danger in focusing too much on the next step? Focusing too much on the future is certainly something I deal with everyday in technology. It seemed I didn’t even have my iPhone 6s before I was reading rumors about iPhone 7. I’ve felt the dissatisfaction with technology, always wishing the future was here, wanting to know what is next, and hating my car because it doesn’t have Tesla falcon wings from the future.
Childhood is not technology. I’ve done my best to not wish away a single second of diaper duty and trade it for the next stage because I have seen the future. Some of those teenage years seem challenging. Yet even while they appear to have some rough patches, they have seem some fun spots too. That’s just it though, each journey is what you make it.
Every day is part of something. It can either be just another day and something you do or it can be part of something wonderful and fun. Each stage will, of course, have its twists and bumps, but with just one eye out for the future, it can become an exciting journey that makes every moment worth living.
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